Of expectations

[Written Monday, 20 April 2009]

I must not be updating my blog often enough if Ben is telling me to write articles while I’m bored at work, to be uploaded online when I have internet access! Lol.

Since it is inevitable that I’m going to start blogging constantly about my big news, what better time to start than when I’m at my wit’s end out of boredom.:)

I have not been feeling extremely positive of late, although this should be one of the happiest times of my life. My swap to a new department has kicked off with my being assigned to another team that does completely unrelated work to what my new department is supposed to do. Coupled with the fact that I spend half my days at work staring into space with no internet connection, it has been a very uninspiring 3 weeks, to say the least. Very far from the career rejuvenation that I’d envisaged.

The highlights have been talking to Ben, my sister and some other friends when I get the chance. I miss my sister. It would have been superb to have her on hand to help me with the task at hand. But so far, it’s been pretty cool to be able to talk to mum about some of the things. It sounds like it’s going to be a fair bit of work, and would be great if I could afford to take a month off to be based where the event will be, get all the prelim planning out of the way and get it off my mind. It would be even more fantastic if Ben could be here for that month so that the decisions could be made together. A girl can dream, right?

Speaking of dreams…

When I was younger I’d always thought that I would have a big white with lots of people – an über-grand affair in a big ballroom or banquet hall. I suppose it’s what I grew up seeing and knowing. And culturally, traditionally, that is what is expected. By your family, by their friends, by onlookers. I haven’t attended many in my adult life – at last count, ONE (1) that wasn’t family-related - but the more I think about it, the more I’d rather have something that reflects my personality (personal and personable (hopefully), a little bit serious, a little fun/crazy, and bending the rules *just a little bit*).

I wouldn’t say small, as I have many people I count as friends whom I would love to be there to share in the fun. Then again, I don’t want massive either. Because then it just becomes extremely impersonal, you don’t get the chance to have any semblance of a decent conversation with a single soul, and the worst part I think is not knowing half the people in attendance.

No doubt, whilst I have my dreams and expectations, so do the other parties involved in this event. Some may have had their own dreams and expectations of this event for longer than I have.

Heritage, culture and tradition dictate that I be an obedient child, adhere to the wishes of others, but I’ve always had a rebellious streak. ;) So let’s just hope that the coming months are as painless as possible!